"Where's Your Iranian?! Where's Your Iranian?!"

Game 1 - Port Vale Away. As were the circumstances, I wasn't as optimistic as I usually would have been. My 2 wingmen were absent and I was apprehensive as to Dale's chances. And what turned out to be a good start to the day, was quickly reprehended. Arriving at Hazel Grove station, the guy behind the desk, who knows I'm nearly 17, was more than happy to give me a child ticket (15 and under) for only £3. Now £3 return on top of hopefully a child match ticket would represent good business for a football match. I trudged to the Platform and waited for my train to Stoke. I felt today was a chance to relax more. Usually at this time on a matchday I am pumping my body full of energy drinks (not beer :p) to get myself hyped up and singing without embarrassment. However, today I felt it was probably a tad inappropriate considering I was on my own, wearing a shirt too small for me and reading The Daily Sport (Basically a 50p equivalent to a lads mag, that includes made up transfer rumours, i.e this week - Raul to Stoke and Van Nistelrooy to Notts County)

So I sat down, alone, and read my paper, alone. Up pops the dreaded "Tickets please" You would think that this would be nothing to worry about, I have my ticket, I have already paid. But I knew I'd get a "your never 15" look despite my best efforts (Shaving the bumfluff and leaving my spots unattended) However, this situation is usually avoided, by chanting " Nananananananaaaaa!!! Ticket Ticket Man, Ticket Man, Tiiiiicket Ticket Man!!!" etc until he is so intimidated he just walks straight past (Morally wrong I know, but it works a treat) Today though, not so much. I closed my eyes and said it in my head... but it didn't work. I thought maybe he'd have sympathy, pity for me going to a football match on my own. No chance. Adult fair. Which to be honest, was only an extra £3. So I wasn't on a complete downer.

20 Minutes's into the journey and I nipped to the toilet, only to come across 4 middle-aged Dale fans drinking beer and having a laugh. I gave my usual "Up The Dale" and walked straight past until I heard "Hold On A Second!" I turned to them only to see one bald man, getting rather excited. Your Peter Crouch, the blogger!!! I recognised your shirt" Why did I ever blog that :/
But no, this guy had come across BIP (Big Headed, Iranian, Peter Crouch) through "There's Always Next Year" and had been reading. I went on to talk for ages with these guys about the blog, why I was on my bill and of course, Dale's chances this season. They invited me to stay with them to the game but I politely declined, from which I think they understood. I was comfortable and these guys were in their element. As I walked off I heard them joking, "Where's your Iranian?" (left - where is that iranian??) they shouted in typical football tune fashion. Excellent :)

I had readers, I had fans. I was famous!!! Not quite... but it's a start. Arriving at Stoke I was stumped as to where and how to get to the ground. The walk seemed too much so I crossed the road and took a bus stopping near the ground. On it were a couple of teenage Port Vale fans. Not as friendly as the older fans I admit but there weren't too many dirty looks, to my face that is anyway. The ground was ok, not the best, not the worst, and my seat for the game was on the opposite side to where most of the singing Dale fans were, just about the middle. I was keen to watch today, more than sing, and really see what Hilly had worked on over pre-season, a lot of it, seemed good. I walked over to talk to my mate Chris at half time, who had made the bench for todays game. He said the gaffer seemed happy and at the break we were level, and playing well. Overall we were the better side. A good goal from the ever more impressive Joey Thompson (after some great work from Buckers) was promising. The disputed handball (which obviously sent our fans into uproar) was disappointing, and in all honesty we should have won the game, not drawn it. The plus side obviously, was that we didn't lose it.

The highlight for me today though, was not the game, the cheap prices (got my junior ticket, the guys at the ground really don't care do they?) or the stress free day. It was those 4 fans I met on the train. At half time, as I lent at the front on the boards, I heard "Crouchie, give us a wave, Crouchie, Crouchie give us a wave" A couple of fans had joined in with the guys from the train as they tried to locate my presence. I gave an indignified thumbs up, before the lads turned round as quick as anything, to reply "Where's Your Iranian? Where's Your Iranian?" There must have been 15+ Dale fans chanting this, most of which probably knew nothing of the blog or "the iranian" But it just really made me laugh, and from something I had written on a blog I believed no one was reading. Absolutely first class, and although I didn't catch any of your names, I said I'd mention you so a big thumbs up to you four. Classic, just classic. I hope to see you again soon, I know your not regulars, but I'm sure I'll catch you again this year.

As I end, I must point out: 1. Not a fan of the away kit 2. Very sad to see Alfie go but he follows the trait of selling our best player year on year to keep alive (Platt, Connor, Holt, Lambert, Perkins, Alfie) 3. Glad Buckley seems he is staying until at least January 4. Disappointing to see us roll over against Wednesday although I didn't go to the game due to lack of return trains to Stockport :( 5. WE NEED TO BRING IN SOME MORE PLAYERS! After letting so many go, we have only brought in one outfield player as a replacement??!! Come on HillCroft pull your finger out!

Up The Dale!

Tennis Torni My Arse!

"Sorry mate, bad news. I've got a tennis tournament."

Are you kidding me? Jesus Christ we've had this planned for months!!! Tomorrow is the big day, first game of the season. The hype, the excitement, the anticipation that has been bottled up for the last 3 months can be released.... yet I'll be doing it on my own. What a joke!!!

Fair play to Niku, he's a sound lad. Although he tends to leave things to the last minute, he is occasionally reliable. Occasionally reliable? That's really not a great quality when you think about it is it?... Forget it, I'm over it. I get the feeling he is too excited with Aston Villa to give a thought about Dale at the moment. Perhaps he feels his first game of the season should always be Villa. Perhaps he's going to Villa tomorrow against Fiorentina... Wait a minute, bugger where's my phone...

Oh well, if he's there he deserves it. He's short on money and I understand that. Me on the other hand, not so much :D Working every morning in the last week has provided me with a healthy £100 budget for the start of the season. Add that to the money I have in my wallet already and that's.... £102.50

Although tomorrow, money isn't an issue. If I manage to blag a child fair - which means shaving off the neat little stubble I've been growing :( - on top of a child ticket, I will only be £11 worse off. The major problem, will be finding my way to the ground from Stoke On Trent. I've been told that it's a 4 mile walk, so that's out of the question. I've got detailed instructions on how to get to the nearest bus stop and where to go from there. Usually, it's just a matter of following the crowd but I remember arriving at Shrewsbury last year, not a Dale fan on the train and no fans at all to be found in the town centre. Me and James relied on policemen to give us a lift to the ground, and although that may seem embarrassing, I can assure you no Shrewsbury fan dared approach us after we stepped out of the back of that car :D Perhaps it will be a case of same again, though I doubt it.

I have no clue what to expect tomorrow, James is away, Niku has a "tennis torni" and other supporters I may take such as Ed (more about him another time) has broken his collar bone, and Mikey is on joo camp (a jewish camp thing in Israel, more about him later too) One thing I do know is that we may have a kit clash. With limited funds, I have not been able to purchase last years, nor will I manage this years (horrible) kit. So it's Centenary Kit through and through. However, it has come to my attention that Port Vale, of course, play in Black and White. So look out for Number 17 tomorrow, in a long sleeved MMC Estates Blue Home Shirt I nicked from my last game at Dale ;) haha!

So boiling hot, friendless, pretending to be 16, with my own sandwiches (another money-saver), I enter the 2009/10 season, fully (not really) prepared and raring (hesitant) to go. However, I will be there and it will be Number 1 on my list. If any of you do see me tomorrow, lonely and sweating like Cheryl Cole in Pizza Hut, then come up to me, have a chat, buy me a pint... you know because I'm under 16... not because I'm cheap! How dare you!!

Up The Dale!!!

A Quiet Summer

So it's July 30th. A few readers may think the blog is dead. Far from it. However, I am not quite as close as I would like to be to 25 games. So far - 0. Talks of Rossendale Away, Blackpool Away, then at Home, Man United aswell, have been dampened. The reason? Money. Other factors in the lack of Dale action so far include broken body parts, football tours, tournaments and fitness regimes, aswell as on off holidays to Iran, visits to Grandma Black, and an addiction to Tennis. But the main overall contributor to a long pre season has been the lack of funding. Without work, a football club, and a face unable to blag child train tickets, I am finding it very hard to get about. The pressure on me to get my drivers licence is also building. We are realising that it is going to be very, very tough for 3 teens to get to as many football games as we hope. Gone are the days that I once went to watch 7 games in 7 days, the same season that I managed to go to a game a weekend from August to May. Truth be told there has been a lot going on, and although I get the impression at times that my 2 companions are not as keen on the idea we set about a couple of months ago, I fully believe that one night in playing Fifa, or even one trip to the WMG Stand, will re-ignite the fire.

So what plans do we have now then? Well it's back to the drawing board and we will begin with the first game of the season away to Port Vale. Me and Niku will book our tickets and will follow that trip with Wigan at home. I have decided that on the side of Dale, the two of us will also use our trips to Villa as an excuse to post here. So things are on the up in all honesty. Villa Park follows Villa Park, and by then we will be in full swing. I am hoping a weeks work down in Poynton can earn me near to £100 next week, which will all be saved for Spotland. Me and Niku have also spoken briefly of a sponsored bike ride (maybe not naked as the picture suggests....yet again we are desperate!!!), with the proceeds going towards, well, US!!! The idea of the bikeride being we cycle to a nearby game from our homes in Stockport. Whatever we do, you will be the first to know and hopefully, the weather clears up for the start of the season. The excitement is quite unbearable as we begin our journey :)

Up The Dale!

Reminiscing Followed By A Change Of Plan

I can't wait for this season to get underway. Writing this blog almost gives me a purpose, and even more of a reason to go and watch Dale. What I am wary of is looking for the funnies though. I don't want to be halfway through a game worrying that nothing of note has happened. In fact, I feel a more relaxed outlook will suit me better. I'll blog when I want to, when it feels right.

It's hard to focus on football in the midst of Wimbledon, The Lions Tour and The Ashes approaching, but when I think back to my experiences of Dale and the season ahead, it becomes harder to bare, that my first game is a month away!!!

I think back to 3 of my most glorious times watching Dale, in order of preference.

3. Dagnall Comeback (Dale 4-1 Rotherham) - I remember when Dagnall fell against Macclesfield. Much like Owen did for England, it was innocuos, but terribly painful to watch. 6 months out and a place on the bench for the Rotherham game. 1-0 down after 6 minutes, we came to the 80th minute level thanks to Gary Jones. On comes Dagnall, the way he recovered from his cruciate injury deserved an ovation in itself. Scoring on his return was spectacular, we went 2-1 up, Dagnall milks the applause, only to do it again in the 89th, and AGAIN in the 93rd. A 10 minute hat trick off the bench after a 6 month layoff. Bloody magnificent, and I still get chills thinking about it. Ball in hand and the fist punch in front of the Thwaites Beer End.
What else is there to say. Same Old Dagnall....

2. Edwards' Cup Heroics (Dale 2-0 Coventry) - One of my first experiences of a Dale match let alone a high profile FA Cup tie. Me and a couple other of the academy lads went on the pitch before the game to wave banners and flags. The atmosphere was electric and I walked out again alongside Paul Connor, scorer of our first goal. Coventry came into the game on a 10 match unbeaten run, and were near the top of the Division 1 (Championship) At my age, I didn't quite understand what it meant to the fans, but what I did understand was that walking away from the ground, I had seen one of the finest Goalkeeping Performances I will perhaps ever see. Nursing a broken finger, a strained thigh and about 25 other niggling injuries, 5ft 8 Neil Edwards stood between the sticks. He collected EVERYTHING, pulled off about 8 incredible saves and kept Dale in the game. Gareth Griffiths, who had arguably his best game for Dale alongside Keith Hill netted the second and I stood up only to be mauled on and pushed 2 rows down. Who cares?
Shame it all ended down at Wolves...

1. Bragging Rights (Stockport 2-7 Dale) - My home turf. Living in Stockport all my life, I was surprisingly never tempted to support County. One of the main reasons? Well, I fell in love with Rochdale, and you don't cheat on your girlfriend, so why do it to your football club? I took the train with about 6 mates (All County regulars) to stand in the roofless away end by myself, and watch us face a team who had previously kept a record number of clean sheets, with now Wales International Wayne Hennesey in goal. Well you can imagine my, lets say surprisement at being 4-0 up inside 17 minutes. We would have kept that clean sheet had it not been for a terrible Rundle back pass and a rare Matty Gilks mistake. As is the nature of Rochdale fans, being 4-2 up at half time was not good. 99% of people I overheard in the toilets, in the stand were negative. I was thinking to myself.... (Now I know I'm with the Dale :D) But there was no need to be, 30 seconds into the second half we were 5-2 up, finishing with 7. The fans were so shocked, the only songs we could sing throughout the second half was "We want 6, we want 6" We got the 6th. "We want 7, we want 7" We got that. "We want 8, we want 8" Perhaps too ambitious?? Nevertheless, it was extraordinary and the smile didn't leave my face, partly because of the result and partly because it was so cold my mouth was frozen like that....

So there are my 3 greatest memories. Niku will argue the case for Macc 0-1 Dale. Well he can be shot, worst game I've been to in a long time. James will of course say "What about Barnet? 2-0 down, won 3-2!!! Alfie, Alfie" Yes, well it doesn't quite compare to the other 3. Myself? Well on another day I might have put the Playoff Semi against Darlington. David Perkins stole my heart that day.... I think perhaps I am bitter that County got revenge, so best not mention it in the top 3.

Finally, I must comment about the change of title. Upon speaking with Matt Boothman (The fabulous writer of There's Always Next Year) I felt that the blog needed something that stood out, something that gave it character. I shortlisted 10 possible options before settling on something that took me a good nights sleep to finally stick to. "The Big Headed, Iranian, Peter Crouch" relates to all 3 of us, who are battling to achieve our goals this year. James (Big Head), Niku (Half Iranian) and Myself (6ft 3 Crouch look-alike) are all one this season, and this unity is shown in the title. It's random, it's bizarre but most of all it's unique and likeable.

Keep reading, thanks for the support.

Up The Dale!

Player Profiles

As expected, I cannot achieve this feat on my own. But it's not quite the more the merrier. There have been plenty of lucky guests I have taken to Dale, most of which have been surprisingly enthralled, however only 2 have committed themselves to this blog, and although they both will miss occasional games, I can be sure to have at least one by my side every time as we push for the 25 mark. Along the way, these 2 guys are sure to provide comic moments, terrific quote's and hyperness that can class as drunkeness at times :) So here we are, a quick "player profile" on both my good mates:

Niku Ghaemi:
He won't thank me for the picture, but it shows what kind of guy he is. Me and him have shared some incredibly humerous experiences following Villa in the past. He's a delight to sit next to (at times) and our antics have actually made us quite popular with many Villa fans. This is something I am itching to convert into Rochdale. With an Iranian Dad, Aston Villa runs in the family for him, but he's agreed to take (a teeny tiny) step back from them this year in order to give Dale a little more leeway. A couple of energy drinks and I have seen this guy explode. A shy guy but when he's out supporting whatever club he does it without fear, embarrasing himself and others around him.... I like that. Already looking to pre-season he has outlined a day in Blackpool as his preference. He's a nice guy, stays away from the drink (more redbull and rockstar than strongbow and fosters) And although he does take some stick for his attitude to school and his nerdyness at times, the way he transfers that keeness and desire to supporting Rochdale or Villa is something you want. So thankyou Niku, I hope you enjoy this journey too.

James Black:
Ahhh, James (Or Blacky to his preference) Let me begin by saying this is a throughly clever lad. If he were born 4 days later than he was (27th August), he wouldn't even be in my year (Same goes for Niku 23rd) but incredibly, he is still twice as smart as I will ever be. However, there are some areas I catch him out in, and in truth I owe an awful lot to him. At times he has been on the wrong end of some fearful cricket bus banter ( mainly due to his abnormaly large head :/ ) and one infamous song written by yours truly has haunted him for a while now ( you'll hear it later :p ) but James always takes it in good spirits. Born in London, but living in Manchester he grew up a Chelsea fan. I wasn't having any of this. The first chance I got I took him to Dale and he was converted - simple as. I truly believe that were you to ask him who he supports he would answer Dale. A quote I must add comes from something he said a few nights back "If any of my family died, and the funeral was on the day of Bury - Dale, I know what I would choose" I seriously believe he would choose Dale aswell. He has inherited this hatred of Bury (referred to in this blog as Buckets from now on) that I would like to think he has got from me :) He is an avid, foul mouthed Dale fan, and one of Mine and Niku's main tasks will be converting his passion and loud mouth, into train journeys and away ends. He will be by my side for all of this (mainly because otherwise he'd stray into subway or a sophisticated bookshop) but also because he's Dale mad, and it's in his system now for good.

So these 2 boys (not quite men yet) will contribute largely to everything I do. I know for a fact that they will make me laugh, and pick me up after defeats aswell as probably stopping me from getting arrested at times (Me and Niku have got close) but overall they will accompany me into the WMG as we hope that this year....will be our year.

Up The Dale!

Fixtures, Tatty Kits And A Trip To Hillsborough!

So today was the day of the long awaited fixtures for next season. There always seems to be an excitement about it, which I can't quite understand. Sure, it's great to see when you play your rivals and who you've got first and last but apart from that, it's not all that it's hyped up to be. Though this was a little bit more significant for me as me and a mate spent an hour on the phone planning out our trips to Dale next year. We had "the defo's", "the maybe's" and the "no chance" Away games within a 3 hour train journey we mapped as certains, whilst we took all the home games that didn't clash with Villa (Me and Niku can't give them up that easily) and all in all we came about with 26 "defo's" which is good going. Circumstances will of course effect the situation later in time. My footy matches, school nights, train times and of course, how much money we have left. However Pre Season matches such as Southport and Blackpool away, should give us a decent "warm up" game before we begin our real quest into next season. It shall be greatly anticipated :)

A few days earlier however, was the design of our new kit. Urgh. We have now sacked Nike and gone with a make of JD Sports. That is now also our sponser :/ It seems the kit has thinner stripes. The home kit I can deal with, the away kit. Not so much. I really struggle to see where the difference is between the purple and the blue/black.



We looked better standing out in yellow or white away from Spotland, as some of our players can't pass a ball 5 yards in the first place, now they will have to check twice in this dreadful number!!! Will I be buying it? I'd like to say yes, but the centenary kit has stood me in good stead and at the same time, I can't afford to waste £40+ on a shirt when I need all the money I can get for train fares and match tickets. I'll pass thanks boys.....

And finally the Carling Cup draw. Strangely enough, it was released a day before the league fixtures, and an away trip to Sheffield Wednesday should prove lively and enjoyable, despite the little chance of success we have. Stranger things have happened though, and it is certainly down in the book as a "defo" Travel details have now already gone out for our first game (Port Vale away) Not exactly like we're going to sell our allocation, but ok..... :?

Lastly, an update on signings. Nice to see us bring in a young keeper from Leeds. The lads got a lot to live up wearing the gloves and having the name Edwards. (Reference to the legend himself: Neil Edwards) But I'm sure young Matt (no relation) will certainly cover Kenny well and play plenty of games this year.

So thanks for reading, not really a humerous account this week, more like a frustrated, excited, information leaflet. But still, I hope we can continue to build on the good reviews we have had so far. Be sure to check out our opening post on what we are about if you missed it. Coming up this week and next will be reviews on the 2 of my mates who will share this adventure, and a little bit more about Dale and life in League 2.
Thanks again,
Up The Dale!

What We Are About

Upon seeing another failed promotion push last season, most Dale fans were disheartened, and fed up. However, me and 2 other mates, were inspired, and now we plan to hit the 30 game mark, with only the money we have from pocket spends and birthday money. Me and Niku Ghaemi are both Villa fans, however after signing for Rochdale in 2002, I fell in love with the club and have been a regular at Spotland from then on. In 2006 I started to travel away, and memoral visits include a 7-2 demolition of Stockport in my home town :)

2007/08 was when things really kicked in for me though, it was Dale's centenary year and the football we began to play was outrageous. On a limited budget, Hillcroft* had managed to transform the way we play, and we began to win games left right and centre. My first visit to Wembley was memorable, despite the 3-2 loss :(
*Keith Hill and Dave Flitcroft

Last year I began taking mates. James Black was the lucky guest, as I took him by train away to Morecambe, only to see us throw away a 1 goal lead. However, he was hooked and since then, my memories with him include a dramatic comeback against Barnet in the FA Cup (2-0 down at Half Time only for Alfie to bag a hat trick) and Shrewsbury away where we were the worst I have seen us, yet a Dagnall wondergoal saved us from defeat.

And this year is where it begins. GCSE's have finished and I turn 17 in September. This means I'll hopefully be driving by Christmas, which means even more Dale away games. Me and Niku will try and fit in Villa alongside but after the Judas (Gareth Barry) had made a fool of our club, we daren't put ourselves through such heartbreak next year.

So we focus on Dale. What are our main aims?
1. For me to be driving by Christmas so we save a fortune on train tickets!
2. To reach at least 25 games home and away.
3. To cement ourselves as Dale Song Starters and to invent a chant that catches on. (My job)
4. To see the mighty Dale achieve promotion, and end a 39 year spell in the bottom tier, newly named (The Rochdale Division)

So please, follow me and my 2 companions in our journey. You will see us haggle for junior train fairs and match tickets, you will see me invite numerous girlfriends to games in the hope of some action at half time, and also the highs and the lows of our season ahead.

I look forward to your comments and reviews. Thankyou, and goodnight :)